Sparks (now a Miller Brewing subsidiary) certainly isn’t the first to mix alcohol and caffeine.  Heck, they’re not even the first to mix alcohol with an energy drink (California Car Bomb anyone?).  They are, however; among the very first to bottle (actually can) the mixture and send it to a store near you.  I got my 4 pack (that’s how you know it’s a serious energy drink, you only get 4 instead of 6) at my local Hannaford, and truthfully, the purchase was mostly made out of spite because my wife made me go to the grocery store against my will.

Background

Before I get to the review itself, I think I need to be fair and state for the record (in so much as this website constitutes any sort of actual, official record) that I am totally not the guy Sparks is marketing to.  Sparks CAEB (because I’m not going to write “caffeinated alcohol energy beverage” ever again), I would imagine, is intended for the 20-something crowd that stays out clubbing until 4AM.  I’m more of a 30-something, try to get to bed before 10 (11 on the weekends) kind of guy.

The Can

The design of the can is somewhat reminiscent of a Duracell battery, but not so much that they’re going to get sued or anything.  The silver can has an orange top (not quite copper) and features +/- symbols just like a battery.  I think it’s Sparks way of letting you know you’re going to get a charge out of their drink or something.  It’s a little corny, I think, but probably no worse than any of the other marketing in the energy drink industry.

The Taste

I tried the original flavor.  Hannaford didn’t have the Light or Plus varieties (I probably would have gone for the light).  The taste was very similar to a watered down Sunkist (or Minute Maid, or Fanta), with the wheaty aftertaste common to many energy drinks.  I’m not sure if that flavor comes from the Taurine, or the Guarana, or the Caffeine itself, but something makes it a tad bitter, and like I said, a little bit wheaty, but it’s not overpowering, not that bad, and by the 4th or 5th sip, I didn’t really notice it anymore.

The Effect

At 6% alcohol per volume, Sparks CAEB packs a bit more of a punch than you average beer, and is right in line with other malt beverages.  As I guy who probably has less than 5 drinks in the average month, I’m a relative lightweight, so the single can of Sparks I had was enough to give me a little bit of a buzz.  I suspect a 2nd would have left me positively stupid.

As far as the energy beverage aspect of the drink.  The caffeine content itself is similar to that of a cup of coffee.  I’m not sure what impact the Taurine and Guarana have on the overall effect, but it left me a bit twitchy, even hours after consumption.  Actually, by 11:00 PM, I was sort of wishing I had only thrown back a half a can.  In hindsight, deciding to test Sparks, and build a workbench in the same evening may have not been the wisest maneuver, but I managed to survive with all 10 fingers and a new workbench t’boot.

Final Thoughts

As I said, Sparks really isn’t for me, or for other guys like me, so it shouldn’t come as any huge surprise that I didn’t love it.  It’s actually a bit of a compliment that I didn’t hate it.  Once, maybe twice a year, I myself out for a real night of drinking.  When next I find myself with a desperate need to rally the troops, I won’t hesitate to reach for a Sparks.  For pretty much every other night of my life I’ll stick to a glass of wine, a nice microbrew, or a glass of whisky.

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